


Carry Your Heart

by eiranerys



Series: Shuann Week 2k19 [5]
Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Sharing a Bed, ShuAnnWeek2k19, brief appearances of the Phantoms Thieves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-05
Updated: 2019-07-05
Packaged: 2020-06-09 19:43:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19482721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eiranerys/pseuds/eiranerys
Summary: Shuann Week Day 5: Early Morning/Late NightRen has survived Akechi's attempt to murder him, much to the relief of the Phantom Thieves. However... Ren didn't exactly escape unscathed. He has both physical and mental scars from it. Luckily, Anne is there to soothe him from his first nightmare after the interrogation.





	Carry Your Heart

" _The leader of the Phantom Thieves committed suicide while in police custody."_

It wasn't difficult to feign her shock at the news. All Anne had to do was think about if the plan had failed, if Akechi had murdered her boyfriend for real. Or that she would never see his gorgeous smile again or feeling his strong arms wrapped around her… She just had to imagine Ren bleeding out on the table. Just thinking about it made her hands shake. The plan they had come up with was a good one, risky as it was. But… was it enough?

This caught the photographer's attention, however, as her hands shaking caused the bike prop in the shoot to rattle.

"Anne-chan?" He raised an eyebrow, concern filling his face. "Is something the matter? You look a bit… out of it."

"No… No…" Anne quickly faked a smile. She just had to think about how she had to force a smile, like she was happy to see Kamoshida. It was the same thing… she was filled with nothing but dread in both situations. "It's nothing." She glanced up at the TV. "It's a bit scary, though, isn't it?" She did her best to feign no interest. She wasn't too sure how well she had succeeded. "The leader of the Phantom Thieves committing suicide."

The photographer just shrugged. "Well, I'm just glad that he's gone," he said, and Anne had to fight back the urge to wince. "What he did… that was just crazy! Hopefully things will die down now."

Anne feigned another smile. "Right…"

No… it wasn't over. Not until they took down Akechi's boss.

"There's that smile of yours!" He nodded in approval, before holding up his camera. "Now hold that pose!"

The shoot dragged on and on. She normally had enjoyed it, especially after finding her resolve but… She felt so on _edge._

She may not be pursuing the job of an actress anymore, but she needed to put on a good show. She didn't know who would be watching.

But it was a relief when the shoot finally ended. She changed into her normal clothes, before checking her phone. There was only one message that mattered.

_[Futaba]: Meeting at Leblanc. Come asap!_

Anne's grip on her phone tightened. Her heart clenched painfully. She closed her eyes before making a silent prayer to whatever divine being that was out there.

_Ren… Please be okay…_

* * *

"REN!"

Ryuji barely managed to step away from Ren in time before Anne wrapped her arms tightly around her boyfriend in a vice grip. She pressed her face against his shoulder.

Oh, thank God. The plan worked. It had worked! She didn't know if she could handle it if Akechi had succeeded in his plan to kill Ren…

"Anne…" Ren gasped out. "Ribs…"

"Sorry!" Anne quickly released him, unable to hold back a little sob. Just looking at him made her heart ache. He had taken beatings, gotten bruises and who knew what other injuries, all for _them._ She rubbed at her eyes. "I'm sorry… I just…"

"Come on, Anne, don't cry." Ryuji slung an arm around her shoulders. "Come on, it's Ren! He's done how many crazy stunts?!"

"Yeah, Anne, please don't cry…" Ren added, before tenderly brushing her hair out of her face. "I'm fine." He then winced. "…Er, relatively fine."

"You're not fine!" Haru was quick to scold, frowning at Ren. "Just look at your face!"

"Guess I don't have my devilishly good looks anymore," Ren said lightly.

"Oh, stop joking like that!" Anne huffed. Normally she'd playfully smack his shoulder when Ren put on an arrogant act, but she didn't want to hurt him. "Seriously… we were all so worried." She bit her lip. "Plus we had to pretend that we were living normal lives after your capture…"

Ren's smile was sheepish. "…Sorry. I just wanted to lighten up the mood a little."

"Seriously, Ren, that's like a total Ryuji move!" Futaba huffed, before pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "I thought you were more considerate than that."

"Honestly, Ren…" Makoto scolded. "It's in poor taste to make jokes like that."

Sojiro chuckled. "A triple scolding, huh?"

"HEY!" Ryuji protested, glaring at Futaba. "Don't drag me into this!"

Futaba just shrugged, before flashing him a cheeky smile. "Can't deny it though~"

Sojiro and Makoto's sister Sae managed to get them to settle down eventually, and they began to explain how exactly they had pulled their plan off.

But throughout the explanation, Anne couldn't keep her eyes off Ren. (It was nothing new to her, anyways.) Just looking at how beat up he was… hurt to see. What had he gone through while in police custody?

She had wished desperately that this hadn't been the only way. But they needed to discover who Akechi was working for, who the mastermind of it all was…

She just… hated seeing the toll on her boyfriend.

Oh, he joked about it, saying that 'well, I died', but… he couldn't be just okay after all that…

They made plans to go to the Diet Building the next day, so they could try and figure out Shido's Palace's keywords, and so everyone slowly trickled out of LeBlanc. Morgana glanced at Anne, then back to Ren, before approaching her.

"Lady Anne, I'll stay with Futaba tonight," he said lowly. "Please… take care of Ren tonight."

Anne smiled at him, scratching him behind the ears. "Thanks Morgana," she said sincerely.

Morgana rubbed against her hand for a moment. "Any time."

He then jumped down from the table, before darting over to Futaba who was leaving the shop. She picked him up, exchanged a quick worried look with Anne before leaving.

Boss coughed, shifting on his feet. "I'll… close up early," he said. "You should get some rest, kid."

"Thanks, Sojiro," Ren murmured.

Anne all but ran to him, her arms circling around him again. She rested her head against his shoulder, inhaling his scent. "Hi," she murmured.

"Hi back." Ren's smile was tired, before gently cradling the side of her face. Anne leaned into his touch, smiling as his fingers traced the curve of her cheek.

"T-Thank god," she breathed out. "I was just so worried about you…!"

Tears pricked at her eyes as she took a good look at her boyfriend. He had a black eye, countless bruises on his face… It was a miracle that his glasses—while they were fake, they seemed like a staple to her boyfriend—had survived. Not to mention the dull bruises circling his wrists. She could only imagine that they were still aching painfully. There were also the bruises and other injuries that Ren could hide with his clothes…

Ren winced. "I never meant to make you worry. I'm fine, Anne, really..."

"Nuh-uh." Anne frowned at him, pulling away from him. She wagged a finger at him. "You don't have to put on a brave face for me, Ren." She then touched his face briefly, gently tracing one bruise. Even though she had been careful, Ren winced. "If I can confide in you," she said softly, "then you can confide in me."

Ren's shoulders slumped, dropping his hand to his side. "I just… I just, oh god, Anne… I almost screwed up. I _barely_ remembered to give Sae the phone in time!" His voice was almost fevered when he spoke.

"Shhh, slow down," she said, before reaching up to cradle Ren's face. "What… What happened?"

Ren's eyes squeezed shut. "They… injected me with some kind of drug," he whispered. "Some kind of truth serum. It messed up my head."

Anger surged her the moment Ren had said the word 'drug'. Her grip on Ren tightened as her blood began to boil. Those bastards… It was bad enough that they beat the crap out of him, but they tried to drug him?! If they ever encountered the bastards who hurt Ren so much, Anne would knock their teeth out. And then give them a taste of her whip. But she snapped to attention when Ren continued.

"I barely remembered the plan in time. I don't even know how I managed to convince Sae to take the phone." A soft sob escaped him. "God, I almost fucked up. And Akechi would've gone after all of you because _I_ screwed up…"

"But you didn't," Anne said. Just thinking about how Ren had put that kind of pressure on himself made her heart ache. It wasn't fair… "You remembered and that's what's important, Ren. You're safe here." She smiled at him encouragingly, before leaning up to give him a quick peck on the lips again. "I… I thought I may never do that again," she confessed.

Ren smiled at her, before leaning down to kiss her again. She longed to touch him more, but she didn't want to agitate any of his injuries.

"Do you need to see your injuries tended to?" Anne asked hesitantly. "I'm sure that we can scrounge around for a first aid kit somewhere… Or I could run to Takemi-san and ask for one…!"

Ren just raised an eyebrow, a teasing smile on his lips. "You could've just said that you wanted to see me shirtless again."

"Ren!" she couldn't help but whine. "That was _months_ ago! I hadn't known anything about first aid then!"

Back when Makoto had just joined them, she had been unimpressed when they had sheepishly admitted that none of them had known first aid. So she had taken to teaching them it after their first real visit to Kaneshiro's Palace. Anne hadn't done… well.

"There's that look I love so much," Ren teased.

Anne put her hands on her hips. "Yeah, laugh it up," she grumbled, before folding her arms over her chest. "You're lucky that I love you, you know."

Ren's smile then turned tender, his eyes softening as he looked at her. Anne's stomach did a flip at the tender look he reserved for her and only her. "…Yeah. I know. I think about it every day."

Anne's face heated up. Ugh, how did he manage to turn the tables on her so easily?! It really seemed that charm came to him as easily as breathing.

"Though, it is late…" Ren began. "Maybe you should head home…"

"I could do that…" Anne said slowly. "…Or I can spend the night with you. I…" She began to fidget, toying with her hair. "…I don't like the idea of leaving you alone," she said softly. "Not tonight."

"But your caretaker…"

Anne waved a hand. "I can just text her and say that I'm staying the night with Makoto," she dismissed. But Ren still looked unsure, so she stuck out her bottom lip in a pout. "Please, Ren…" she pleaded, widening her eyes at him.

Ren just shook his head. "Okay, okay… you don't have to give the puppy dog eyes…" He then smiled at her. "…You're really stubborn, you know that, right?"

"Pffft!" Anne rolled her eyes at him. "You're one to talk!"

Ren then made a sweeping motion towards the attic. "Shall we then, my lady?"

Anne had to giggle as she followed him upstairs. Ren rooted around for some spare clothes, handing a set to Anne first. He then turned around, letting her change into them.

Anne smiled as she slipped on Ren's hoodie and sweats. She hadn't understood the cliché of borrowing—stealing, really—your boyfriend's clothes until Ren had lent her his clothes. She _loved_ wearing Ren's clothes. There was something about his clothes that made them so _cozy._ Of course, it helped that his scent clung to his clothes. She had always loved the smell of coffee, but… Ren made it even better.

After she was done changing, Ren picked up his own clothes. But Anne stopped him for a moment. "Let me help you," she whispered. "But you can spare some of the medicine that Takemi-san has been selling you, right…?"

Ren hesitated for a moment, before he slowly nodded. He removed his glasses first, setting them aside. Then he unzipped his jacket and shrugged it off. Anne gradually peeled off his shirt underneath. She had to bite her lip so she wouldn't gasp at the dark bruises mottling his skin.

Her eyes were immediately drawn to the angry red marks trailing down his rib cage.

"What did they do?" she hissed out, not knowing if she should be angry or sad. (Probably both.)

Ren grimaced. "You don't want to know, Anne…"

Ren… Anne blinked back the tears, forcing herself to reach for the clean pajamas. She wished desperately that she could use Hecate to heal him, but sadly, they weren't in the Metaverse. Since there was just bruising, she just ended up winding a bandage around his torso, carefully to not wrap so tightly that it caused him unnecessary pain. She then helped him into his clothes. She went slow, so not to agitate Ren's injuries.

"Thanks, Anne," he muttered, before lying down on the bed.

Anne lied down as well, tweaking a lock of Ren's hair. "…It's no problem," she murmured back.

Anne had to admit that Ren's bed wasn't the most comfortable thing to lie on. It was on the narrow side, and well… it was kinda stiff too. But Ren made a comfortable enough pillow.

"I really do love it when you wear your hair down," Ren murmured, sweeping her hair out of her face.

Anne just giggled. "Maybe I'll wear it down more… just for you."

Ren smiled tiredly. "That would be nice…"

Anne leaned forward, gently kissing his forehead. She was so glad that she could do this still… even though she hated seeing how beat up Ren was. "We should go to sleep," she murmured.

"Yeah…" Ren said softly. "Night, Anne."

"Good night, Ren."

* * *

Anne woke up to Ren thrashing in bed. He was sweating, his lips parted. "Please no… isn't it enough that you…? Akechi! Leave them _alone!"_

"Ren! REN!" she called. She wanted to reach out to shake his shoulder but she hesitated. His injuries were so bad already… But was it any better to just let him be trapped in a nightmare?

Ren's eyes snapped open before she could make a decision. She… She had never seen him so vulnerable, but when he reached out to her, Anne met him halfway, gently wrapping her arms around him. He was shaking. He couldn't stop shaking.

Ren buried his face against her shoulder, all while holding her tightly. She could feel his tears soaking her shoulder. "Thank god… I thought…"

"Shh…" she crooned, gently running her hands through his dark locks. She slowly began to rock him in his arms, like how her mom used to when she was a little girl. "I'm here."

They remained in this position for the longest time, but Anne didn't care. Comforting Ren was her top priority.

"Do you… wanna talk about it?" she asked gently, rubbing comforting circles on his back.

Ren was silent for the longest time. Then he raised his head. "I… I dreamed that Akechi killed me," he said hoarsely. "And I could only watch helplessly as he picked off all of you… one by one. You were last, Anne…" Tears began to drip down his face. "And I couldn't do anything to protect you…!"

Every choked out word was like a stab in her heart. Oh, Ren… He carried the burden of being the leader. He was a wonderful leader. He instilled confidence in them, like nobody else could. He _radiated_ confidence. Anne knew in her heart that she would follow him through _anything,_ hell or highwater _._ But… that also meant that Ren tried to carry the burden all on his shoulders.

She… She hadn't realized this until Ren had broken down, the night Haru's father had died. He had blamed himself, beat himself up for this. She had felt so ashamed, that she hadn't realized how this affected her boyfriend so much. But she had vowed that he would never feel that way. Ever.

"T-There was so much blood… And Akechi just _laughed_ when he shot you."

"Shh…" she whispered, gently smoothing her hands over his face. "I'm here, Ren. You're safe. I'm not leaving you, Ren… _Ever._ We're gonna take down Shido. _"_

Ren still was trembling. Anne bit her lip. What could she do…?

But then a sudden memory floated in her mind. Something that her mother used to do when she was unhappy or upset about being bullied or when she was sick.

She stopped rubbing circles into Ren's back, choosing instead to do another motion. She felt instead of seeing Ren frown in response. "What… What are you doing?"

"Something my mom would do when I was upset or sick," Anne explained. "She'd trace words on my back… my arm… It'd distract me enough to focus on what she was writing… and I'd forget what upset me so much."

"You could at least use Japanese," Ren complained.

Anne giggled. "You should really brush up on your English," she teased lightly, smiling as she finished writing _I love you so much._

Ren fell quiet but it was a more… peaceful quiet. "Do you… do you really think we can do it?"

"With you by my side…" Anne gazed into his dark eyes. She still could remember the way he had looked at her months ago, on a rainy spring day. She hadn't known then just how special that stranger would become. "…I think I can do _anything._ I mean it when I saw that you're my light, Ren." She rubbed his arm. "I want you to remember that I'm here for you, okay? You don't have to face these fears alone… You shouldn't have to burden yourself like this."

"Anne… thank you." Ren's expression softened. "If I'm your light… you're like the sun to me."

Anne leaned forward, pressing her lips to his cheek for a moment. "Any time, Ren," she said softly. "You did so much to protect us from Shido… the least I could do is protect you from your doubts…"

Ren just hugged her close, pressing his cheek against her shoulder with a soft sigh. "Thank you, Anne… I love you…"

His eyelids were drooping again.

"I love you too." Anne wrapped her arms around him as well, kissing his temple now. "Get some rest," she said softly. "You deserve it."

She knew that this was just the first of sleepless nights, nights filled with nightmares. But she was okay with that… as long as she was there to remind him that he wasn't alone. He would never be alone again… not if she had anything to say about it.

* * *

_"… here is the deepest secret nobody knows_  
_(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud_  
_and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows_  
_higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)_  
_and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart_

_i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)"_

– E.E Cummings

**Author's Note:**

> Because there needs to be more post interrogation fics. I wanted to explore the burdens Ren carries as the leader because come on... the poor boy has to deal with a lot of crap. Please let his friends be there for HIM.


End file.
